Learn English The Malkmus Way

I never really got into Pavement, so I've been pretty immune to the excitement generated by their reunion, but it does give me an excuse to share my one and only Pavement-related anecdote, which takes place in Beijing a few years ago.  My Chinese friend, who was driving me to the airport, had the radio tuned to a station that played English language lessons.  The lesson that was playing as I arrived at the terminal, and that made me wish I didn't have to get out of the car, was using as its text the lyrics to Pavement's "Cut Your Hair".  So, Pavement fans can take pride in the fact that potentially millions of people in China have been learning English via Steve Malkmus lyrics.

Workin' Over the American Songbook...With A Louisville Slugger

I think this is more shocking than the Dylan Christmas album (and probably not as good). Make sure to scroll down. The Amazon Customer Review Creative Writing Squad has already gotten busy on this one.

(via the Village Voice - following the link to the Deadspin-commissioned remix is recommended)

Dream Journal #1 - A Dark Premonition???

Posting this makes me a little uneasy. I guess I'm afraid that I might be opening a window into a corner of my psyche best left hidden. But here goes:

Last night, I had a dream about tonight's David Byrne concert in Prospect Park. Except it wasn't in Prospect Park. The tall, two-level stage was set up in an empty lot. The Dave Matthews Band was also on the bill. Among other items for sale, you could buy a George Jones Greatest Hits album at the merch table.

And here's the weirdest part: playing in David Byrne's band were MSNBC host Joe Scarborough, on standup bass, and his father, also on standup bass. For the record, I know nothing about Joe Scarborough's father or even if he's still living.

David Byrne was on the upper level of the stage playing acoustic guitar. Scarborough and Scarborough were on the lower level, side by side, plucking away at their basses. I have no idea what song it was.

I'm planning to attend the real David Byrne show tonight, and I have two wishes: that the forecast for rain turns out to be wrong, and that my dream doesn't turn out to be a premonition.

MJ's Tsochkes

Comedian Paul Scheer (who I once stood in a long line to see introduce clips from Trapped in the Closet with Aziz Ansari - it was worth it, but still not as entertaining as just watching Trapped in the Closet on its own, if that makes any sense) has posted a Flickr set of items from the Michael Jackson Neverland Ranch auction. Unless your time is unbelievably valuable, it is worth your time to look at it.

[Via Time Out NY]